Often parents start the week before an IEP meeting feeling the weight of the importance of the work to be done. Between the paperwork, the emotions, and the unknown factors, the burden is tremendous. The good news is that parents do not need a perfect plan or a full reset to feel grounded. One clear step that will help the begin the week with confidence instead of overwhelm is all that is needed. In this article, we will share some simple ways to start strong and set the tone for a calmer and more prepared IEP week.
Starting the week strong isn’t about doing everything. It is about choosing one action that will reduce stress and increase clarity. Parents should keep in mind that small, actions taken early in the week before the IEP meeting can prevent the stress of last-minute scrambling. When parents have clarity, their confidence is increased, even when the meeting is high stakes. Being prepared in advance is important because when the process feels manageable, parents are less likely to be exhausted by the process. Parents should look at the work that needs to be done and pick one action that can move things forward. That one action can change their energy, clarity, or confidence.
There are a few tactics parents can take:
- Start the meeting with a simple parent statement.
- Sit back and review the IEP with fresh eyes.
- Plan to have support during IEP meeting week.
Simple Parent Statement
A simple parent statement can set the tone for the IEP meeting by clarifying what matters most. Parents creating a statement that clearly identifies what matters is a good idea because it centers the parents’ voices. When the parents’ concerns are clearly identified, it can help reduce their emotional overload. A written statement means that parents will not have to worry about forgetting to mention important matters because they will be written in the statement. This type of statement will also help parents make sure their concerns are communicated to the rest of the IEP team.
Parents can write a simple statement for IEP meetings in 10 minutes. To do this, the parents must list out their child’s strengths. Those strengths need to be acknowledged by the entire IEP team. Once everyone on the team knows the child’s strengths, those strengths can be used to support areas where the child needs support. The parents’ statement should also list areas of concern for the parents. If the parents do not put their concerns on record during the IEP meeting, those areas may not be addressed. When the concerns are in the parents’ statement, even if parents are nervous at the IEP meeting, when they go through the statement point by point at the meeting, the concerns can be addressed by the team. A final area that should be included in the parents’ statement is the top 2 -3 goals the parents have for their children. IEP meetings are concerned with setting goals for students to work towards. Parents are equal members of the IEP meeting. The goals they set for their children should be given the same weight as the goals set by the in school members of the IEP team.
Here are a few simple examples of simple parents’ statements.
1 Elementary School Student
Strengths: Diane loves science experiments, she is very social, and she responds well to positive reinforcement.
Concerns: Diane’s reading fluency is below grade level; she often has meltdowns during transition periods and as a result needs clearer routines.
Goals: We would like to see Diane’s decoding skills improve, for her to build confidence when interacting with her peers, and for her to have support for smoother transitions.
We hope that the new IEP plan helps her to feel confident with her reading and supported during transitions so that she can participate fully in class so she will be ready for the new school year.
2 Middle School Student
Strengths: Nathan is a creative thinker with strong verbal skills who loves technology and coding.
Concerns: Nathan struggles with organization and executive functioning as a result he has trouble keeping track of assignments, he also has anxiety when working with his peers on group projects.
Goals: We would like to see Nathan strengthen his executive functioning, increase his comfort level when working with peers, and receive the support he needs to consistently complete assignments.
We would like to see Nathan ‘s IEP focus on building independence and help reduce the stress and pressure caused by managing multiple classes and assignments.
3 High School Student
Strengths: Angelica is motivated to work, does excellently with hands-on tasks, and is known to be kind and respectful.
Concerns: Angelica needs support planning for her options after school; she struggles with time management and is anxious when encountering new environments.
Goals: Angelica would like her IEP to include a transition plan, increase her self-advocacy skills, and help her prepare for employment or college after high school.
As she prepares for life after high school, we would like Angelica’s IEP to emphasize real-world skills, self-advocacy, and include clear steps toward her transition goals.
As a bonus, parents should make sure the parents’ statement ends with an answer to the question, “if the team remembered only one thing about my child, what would it be?” The answer to this question will help the in school members of the IEP team see the child as a person who is cared for, important, and matters. The answer to this question helps make the child appear to be an individual who matters and thus is deserving of best efforts the school IEP team has to offer.
Review the Draft IEP with Fresh Eyes
During the week before the IEP meeting, parents should review the draft IEP plan critically as if they are looking at it for the first time. This review matters because the draft IEP gives parents insight into the assumptions being made by the school members of the IEP team. By reviewing the draft of the document before the meeting, parents have time to prepare relevant questions and make a list of things they want included in the final IEP.
When looking at the draft IEP parents should specifically look at:
- Present levels
- Goals
- Accommodations
- Time services will be provided.
- Missing or unclear language
When reviewing the draft IEP, parents should set a timer so that they review the document for only 15 minutes at a time. This will help prevent overwhelm. It is also a good idea for parents to use highlighters as they review the draft IEP. For example, green highlighting can be used for areas where the parents agree with what is in the document. Red highlighting can be used to show areas of disagreement. Yellow highlighting can be used to indicate areas where parents have questions. The final questions parents should ask when reviewing the draft IEP is “What part of this draft needs more clarity before I can feel confident?”
Support During IEP Week
Support during IEP meeting week is important. It matters because IEP meetings involve a great deal of emotional labor. Parents do not have to manage this week alone. They can and should ask for support. This support can be emotional support provided by friends, advocates, and partners. It can be practical support in the form of childcare, meal assistance, and schedule adjustments. Support may also take the form of mental support such as reading affirmations, meditating and grounding practices.
To set up necessary support early in the IEP meeting week, parents can send out a text requesting help. They can also block out 20 minutes on the calendar to engage in IEP specific support work. Parents should choose a self-care anchor to help reduce stress and feelings of overwhelm. A self-care anchor is a single practice, phrase or ritual that parents can rely on when things are chaotic, overwhelming, or emotionally loud. These are things that parts can use to quickly and quietly get back to themselves without the need for a complicated routine.
In conclusion, you don’t need to have a perfect week in order to walk into your IEP meeting with confidence. You just need to start the week with a plan in mind and execute it. Now that you have read this post about how to have a good IEP meeting week, share this post with other parents who have IEP meetings scheduled. Take time to think about what is one step you can take today that will make IEP meeting week feel lighter.
Further Reading
20 Tips for Educators: A Powerful and Informative Series
Unlock Your Doctoral Success: Coaching & Resources That Work
Unleash the Fire Within: Maya Angelou’s Lifegiving Wisdom for Educators
About the Author
Dr. Janeane Davis is Founder and Principal Consultant at Janeane Davis and Associates: Educational Consultants. Her work is rooted in practical wisdom and strategic clarity—offering educators tools that honor both their brilliance and their bandwidth. She writes to make systems feel human and tips feel like rituals worth keeping.
One desk. Many drafts. Always refining
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